Sometimes i felt i think too much

I have so much to say
I want to express so much
I can't

Maybe i'm thinking so much
I'm easily contented i guess
Maybe this 1 year plus single made me don't know how to care?
Hahaha..
idk

Maybe i do...

I feel like i'm a fucker sometimes
I don't know
I have feelings too

I'm a human too
I needed care too
I needed love too eh
hahah.. these words sound so familiar

when people use these words i will shoot back
Yes, but only you have feeling meh?
Others don't?

Sometimes im just being contradicted by myself
Today i din went sch

Missed my UT i guess
sigh

I can't sleep i seriously can't
till late morning

(Entertainment Time)

I've always been waiting
waiting for even short replies
A simple reply brighten up the day
finally i understand

The insecurity i have
makes me seems like a despo

Yet i have to stop myself from being one
because i'm not

these short stories i write
these sentence i think of
the things i go through
the things people go through

life isn't so tough
but comes to love is unpredictable

simple word i love you
simple being together could be like getting so tough

how many passed opportunity
which can never come back
never again
even how much tears you shed
i understand the feeling

i understand the feeling of even though how much begging
pleading
yet,
no replies
no answer
no reaction from the person you love

My memories have stuck
painful memories that made me grow up to become someone like this
till now i can't forget
can't forget that particular scene

Maybe since then i have form a barrier to prevent myself from getting hurt
to become ignorance
but seriously am i like that?

no...
i'm not

i hate to say this
but i'm kind

i hate to say this but i rather hurt myself at times
even if it meant to be my own happiness
have i hurt my loved one?
upteen times i guess

through all these years
i become so scare of loving
to really put down all my heart in loving
but i still do

i still do and i still will,
Why everytime when i decided to love someone wholeheartly i got hurt?

why?
why when i put 100% people do not at the start?

Do i look like a fucking idiot?

Past
all these have pass

Memories still haunting me now and then
to make me always think
have i become someone whom always think so much?

I dont want seems despo
nor paranoid
cause i hate it
Luckily i'm not

I hate people who suddenly go MIA
why?
In actual fact im not angry
but rather sad

Since the first goes MIA twice
Made me become so scare..
maybe fear?
i don't know
suddenly leave

Break up this word mean so much
never put this word like it could be said so easily
seperate and break ain same
but i just don't like
after the second

Fourth let me learn so much
Learn my mistake
that i made
if you are not confirm with your feeling
don't be together simple
end up hurting more people and that person whom love you.

Fifth made me have so many painful memories
that really made me grow up somewhat heartless at times

Sixth, if you never persevere on
why cant persevere on
set back?

hahahaha... my entertainment so boring today

past love
past opportunities

Sometimes when i look back i so feel like crying out loud
but it's only me that dwell in
that i miss it

I have not learnt this lesson

craps lah
hahaha
I'm still waiting

Maybe i should grow up more